High school students demand to be killed
I think that some people who believe in the "giving guns to teachers" bill would disagree with me but I think that most students, teachers and parents would agree with me. I chose this particular media to address the societal problem because I think that it is a convenient way of reaching out to many people. My response effectively satirizes the issue I chose because it is criticizing some elements of human behavior by portraying it in an extreme funny way. It may be offensive to some people and makes a serious point. The 3 literary humor devices I used are hyperbole "High school students demand teachers to kill their friends because they and their teacher don't like them." because this sentence is exaggerated. Irony "One of the parents who came to the school to look at the riot was quite impressed by how thoughtful their children." because no parent would be impressed by something like that and sarcasm "Why in the world do all the staff in our school have guns if they are not used to kill students?" because students are being sarcastic here.
Sacramento, CA - High school students demand teachers to kill their friends because they don't like them. Today at noon, all the students in California High School created a riot in front of the school building, telling their teachers to kill their "dumb" friends. "We don't like them so why don't we just kill them", they said. "This has happened for too long" Henry Sarvosky, Principal of the school said. "I think that we should listen to the poor students. After all they are here to be killed one day or another. I mean why do we just waste our precious time teaching these useless rocks in society when we can just kill them. Better now than later, right?" A student on the crowd said, "Why in the world do all the staff in our school have guns if they are not used to kill students? I say the students should have the right to tell their teachers whom to kill, right?"
One of the parents who came to the school to look at the riot was quite impressed by how thoughtful their children. She said, "When I reached the school, there was a huge crowd in front of the school and they were all shouting: 'Give us death! Give us death!'. I have to say, I completely agree with all the students and support them 100 percent. I don't send my children school to be safe and sound. That is so 10 years ago. Today in 2014 we work on getting rid of useless people of our country. Teachers have guns and 1 hour of gun training for the bettering of our society not to just keep them locked up somewhere. They should use it at free of will and do whatever they like. I also think they should also keep it in near sight so that if they're not around, other students can shoot each other. I would also help them do their work even more effectively but I still don't have a gun because the rifle I had was outlawed because it had a pistol grip and removable magazine. Stupid bills!"
A math teacher of the school said,"They do have a point. I mean just look at my math class just the other day. I was teaching inequalities in my class when I got so mad because I had spent about a week on that chapter and still most of the class had no idea about anything I was teaching. I just wanted to shoot each one of them and the smart students were telling me to do it. I decided to go for it but sadly, the bell rang." Several teachers said something like this has happened in their classes and they would also like to shoot students they do not like or if they do stuff they don't like. I think that the school should listen to us and the students and give us the right to do whatever we want with the gun. After all they're the ones who gave us the gun in the first place."
This is The Remarkable News coming from California High School. Stay tuned for more news of what happens next.